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World

Israel and Palestine Reach Agreement: Modern Family Is Hilarious

Israel and Palestine Reach Agreement: Modern Family Is Hilarious
After years of bitter struggle, the Israel and Palestine camps have reached an agreement: Modern Family is the best show on television. Negotiations had been at a standstill until both sides realized it...
January 30th, 2012

Truth or Dare Game Ends Really, Really Badly

Truth or Dare Game Ends Really, Really Badly
January 25th, 2012

Newsflash! Facebook Passes Earth in Users

Newsflash! Facebook Passes Earth in Users
If you follow technology news, it will come as no surprise to you that the popular Silicon Valley social network Facebook announced that that they have reached 7.5 billion users, and surpassed their main...
January 12th, 2012

God Awkwardly Forgets Son’s Birthday Again

God Awkwardly Forgets Son’s Birthday Again
According to scriptural and journalistic sources, God forgot the December 25th birthday of his first and only son, Jesus Christ of Nazareth, for the third time in the last 2,000 years. “I got really...
January 8th, 2012

New Year’s Resolution Negatively Affects Everyone Else

New Year’s Resolution Negatively Affects Everyone Else
January 8th, 2012

Hammurabi’s Code Receives Check-Minus in CS106A

Hammurabi’s Code Receives Check-Minus in CS106A
Sixth King of Babylon and Stanford CS106A student Hammurabi recently received a check-minus on the Code he submitted to his disappointed CS106A section leader after taking two late days. “I don’t even...
November 11th, 2011

Stanford University to Apply Early Decision to the United Nations

Stanford University to Apply Early Decision to the United Nations
On Wednesday, Stanford University announced that it would be applying early decision to the United Nations class of 2016. With more Olympic medals, more Nobel laureates, and a larger endowment than most...
November 10th, 2011

Ubeki-beki-beki-beki-stan-stan-ites Rejoice as Dictator Replaced by New Dictator

Hope springs anew in the war- and poverty-plagued middle east as Ubeki-beki-beki-beki-stan-stan holds democratic elections following the toppling of its long-standing dictatorship. Already, the new terrorist-sponsored...
November 10th, 2011

Stanford Beijing to Bring Tourism to China

Stanford Beijing to Bring Tourism to China
This week, Stanford finalized a proposal to build a $4.5 billion campus in Beijing. Dubbed “StanfordBJ,” the campus will increase the presence of Stanford across the Pacific. “Stanford...
November 8th, 2011

Jews Haggle Over Value of Human Life

The recent landmark prisoner exchange between Israeli and Palestinian governments marks the beginning of new negotiation opportunities on both sides of the Jordan. But Jews of the world are torn over the...
October 28th, 2011
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